Cringe: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐
Enjoyment: ⭐
In a post-apocalyptic world brought on by the Coronavirus, communism runs rampant, meetings are forbidden and Christianity is illegal. A band of young believers launch an underground revolution to reunite Christians and regain freedom from their oppressive superiors.
Introduction#
2025: The World Enslaved by a Virus is a 2021 American fantasy film written and directed by Simon Wesely and Joshua Wesely. It’s their first film and was made at the height of the Coronavirus Pandemic in the United States. In fact, I think it was the first film that anyone working on this project had ever made, and as you’ll find out, it shows.
Since this came out during lockdown, and people didn’t have anything better to do, you’ll find an absolute deluge of reviews and reactions making fun of it. I’m here to tell you they’re all completely justified. The entire thing is a right-wing, American “christian” grift, playing into the conspiracy theory that COVID-19 was being used by Communists to control the good folks of the USA… and also make Christianity illegal. I have no idea how they managed to market and distribute this ridiculous propoganda, do that many people have brain-rot?
Plot#
Normally in this section I would write about characters, plot elements from the first act, or other interesting things which define a film. The thing is, 2025 doesn’t really have any of that. Shit just kinda happens, you know, one scene after another, but there’s not really anything that ties it together to make a movie. It’s mostly the same people talking in different rooms, or trying to give important sounding monologues. You’ll have to bear with me while I try to describe it.
2025 starts off with a brief, slow-speed car chase, where Joshua is apprehended by military-looking people. He’s taken to an interrogation room, where we find out he’s been arrested for having a copy of the bible and what I believe is a copy of the constitution for Germany. He proceeds to go on this long rant about how everything was prior to the pandemic, day-dreaming about a mega-church sermon and white cis-het people getting married. Anyway, it seems like he convinces the police to let him go, since next time we see him he’s free.
Joshua has some revolutionary friends, and they want to overthrow the evil Communists keeping them locked up, so they hatch a plan: Spray paint Jesus fish in the forest to spread the word. And they do just that. However, they have cleverly chosen to use blue and pink spray-paint, I think to represent the two genders they believe to exist. Unintentionally, they end up making the gayest looking Jesus fish ever when they combine the two, and I love it.
Next up there is a bunch more talking in rooms and such. The biggest thing that comes of this is a new character, a female hacker who is sympathetic to their cause. She has a knockoff punk kind of look and speaks in what I think is supposed to be a Russian accent, but her acting is so bad that I can’t be sure. Aside from this, our revolutionaries have a Christian singalong around a campfire at night, which is rudely interrupted when they’re raided by the armed forces again. Remember, Christianity is illegal.
Fast-forward through some more pointless drivel, including several speeches by Joshua, and the damn thing is nearly over. How does it end? Well, poor Joshua dies a martyr, just like Jesus. Moral of the story? None. Joshua doesn’t actually accomplish anything throughout the film, so in this fantasy land things probably just continue on the way they have been.
Review#
2025: The World Enslaved by a Virus is easily one of the worst films I’ve ever seen. I’m pretty sure film students could have done better with $100 and a cell phone. What really propels into the upper stratosphere of shit, though, is the ham-fisted agenda. This is very clearly right-wing, extremist propoganda, meant to instill fear that Christians are somehow being persecuted against. Now, plenty of stuff like this gets made every year, but you usually don’t see such widespread distribution. I checked, and it is available on a dozen or more streaming services in the US alone.
Should you watch 2025? Absolutely not. There is no redeeming quality whatsoever to it. I would rather watch paint dry, or water boil, or really anything else other than subject myself to this film. Don’t even imagine you can ironically enjoy it.
Cringe 5/5: Every single scene was peak cringe. Also, I think it was mostly or all filmed in Germany and passed off as the US.
Enjoyment 1/5: The pink and blue Jesus fish was cute, the other 90 minutes was the most dull, uninspiring, and poorly executed film I can imagine existing.
Recommended Audience: No one.